When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.
- Lao Tzu
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It may be possible to cope up with time for human being in case of normal race, but it is next to impossible to beat it if the race between two is of obduracy. Time has no doubt, capacity of storing memories but time doesn’t have time to ruminate those memories. Just to flow without any emotions is not only its characteristics but compulsion.
Human being in such case is little bit lucky (?), however so called memory power is not interested in bifurcation of good and bad- in another word-happy or sad memories. The incident which had given more pain can be recalled at its utmost capacity by that blessed (!) memory power.
Today is New Year eve. Whole world is busy welcoming the upcoming year with new hope. No matter Rahul is a part of this world where everybody is in mood of celebration, but he felt as if he is the only one on this planet, Feeling of loneliness although surrounded with crowd. One year ago- on the eve of New Year....
“I’m not going to speak with you. You have forgotten my birth day. Why are you so late on this special day too?”
“Oh my little angel, I’m on my way, just coming dear”
“And my gift?”
“got late for your favourite gift-piano”
“can’t believe, I want to listen my favourite tune, may I?”
“sure, here it is”. Rahul played the tune she liked the most and sweetest bell rang again, “OK. Pl come soon, I am eagerly waiting for you”.
Suddenly rang the phone and Rahul’s journey from past laded in the present. “I’m not going to speak with you. You have forgotten my birth day. Why are you so late on this special day too?” Rahul couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Before he could respond, line got disconnected. He felt very bad and helpless. Walking out of the room, he murmured to himself, “I will fail her again”.
Ramya - Rahul’s beloved sister passed away exactly one year ago on New Year eve. He spent whole year as if an object, breathing was there but life? After walking out from his house, legs automatically started moving towards gift shop. He purchased Ramya’s favourite baby piano. For shopkeeper piano may be an ordinary, non living product he sell, but for Rahul it is the most valuable object on the earth. The tune from it is not just light music- but, deep connection between siblings. Little piano- small, tiny fingers, lovely and prettiest smile.... Oh! God can’t be cruel at this extent. Painful memories took capture in his mind. He paid value of piano but somehow it seemed heaviest to hold. He hold it so tightly that no one can even touch except Ramya...
Pace of mind is as cruel as time. So called our own mind most of the time acts according its liking-disliking and not ours. It’s difficult to convince it to perform according our wishes. However today Rahul’s mind honoured his feelings and ordered legs to reach Cancer Cure Hospital as soon as possible- whole body obeyed instruction and reached well known hospital of the city where Ramya took her last breathe, not waited for her birth day gift too...
No visible change was seen in hospital except empty bed of room no. 211, he settled piano gently with trembled hand on it. Hardly controlled tears till now came out. You can’t force tears to stay within boundaries of eyes all the time. He cried for long time, one fellow, named Amar ( there is no connection between meaning of name and its characteristics) who was admitted in that room continuously watching him. Suddenly his eyes fall on piano and shocked. Slowly got down from his bed and came towards Rahul. He shuffled after walking few steps. Bald head indicated his poor health. He may have very few days to be a part of this beautiful planet.
Amar put his hand on Rahul’s shoulder with warmth. Gesture sometimes works very hard on behalf of words. Both of them understood feelings of each other. Amar asked with sympathy, “I personally feel you might have best friendship with pain. You have provided much liberty to tear, am I right?” after deep breathing (just to gain energy for further conversation) he continued, “very strange but true- whom we feel nearest and dearest, reasons of our every smile on our face- most probably basis of our tears too. Let’s offer life fully freedom to flow at its wish.”
Many use words as a weapon, few uses as a therapy. Amar’s words worked as a medicine. He led Rahul to a stool beside his bed. Rahul saw same piano on Amar’s bed, now it is his turn to shock and couldn’t manage to hide his emotion. Amar understood the feeling of surprise, “What happened?” Glazy replied, “Today I feel myself the weakest human being- one elder brother, who is wealthiest but not able to fulfil a little wish of his younger sister. Destiny always joking with me and I can’t manage to get rid of its trap. Today is birth day of my lovely little sister who was passed away one year ago- on her birth day without accepting my gift. And now the same thing occurs... leave it. You say something about yourself”.
“What a co- incidence? Today is my little sister’s birth day too. She called me daily and reminded me about her birth day gift-piano. But today..”
“Has she called you today?”
“Not yet. I think she Offended, I’m waiting for her call but ....”
Rahul spoke to himself-“she called today too, but by mistake to me”.
Amar continued, “she is very innocent and believe that I am in abroad for my work and going to reach home today with her favourite gift”.
“Then what’s the problem? Just give her pleasant surprise.”
Amar shouted with fear, “No way. I never allow her to meet me in my present condition. I do not want to ruin image she has about myself.”
There was pin drop silence took place for a while. Silence does not provide peace in each and every condition. Lot of calculations came into Rahul’s mind. Telepathy does its work strongly. Same thoughts occur in Amar’s mind also. Suddenly the sentence which Rahul was dying to hear sliding from Amar’s mouth, “Can you do one favour? Will you please handover this gift to my sister?”
Rahul replied happily, “Sure, I think destiny tries to correct its mistake by giving me chance to be a reason of someone’s smile”. Amar gave Rahul idea of his family, “One elder sister who knows everything but younger one..”
“Don’t worry. I will manage. I handover your gift on behalf of you and will give my introduction as your friend- not only physical gift but I will try to handover your feelings too”.
Both of them didn’t require utter word of thanks- eyes did great job again.
Rahul was walking towards provided address by Amar and the whole body was trying at its best capacity to fulfil Rahul’s commitment. Legs did not want to compromise with the Speed, however it had to face up with traffic and distance. It was really toughest half an hour, but ultimately motion got destination. Legs felt same vibration to reach to the door which hand experienced while reaching to the doorbell.
Amar’s elder sister opened the door. She was wondered to see Gudia’s favourite piano in hand of unknown person. Before she asked any question, Rahul gave her brief about what happened since last one hour. Tears came out from sister’s eyes. Rahul felt guilty to make her cry. Sweet voice came from inside, Didi, has Bhaiya came?” It was really unbearable situation. Rahul thought he might not be able to control the situation, so he turnaround to leave that place. He heard the conversation between Gudia with his sister.
“Why Bhaiya has gone without wishing me?”
“Bhaiya has not arrived. He has some work to complete and promised to come soon. He asked his friend to give your piano. Come on play your favourite tune which Bhaiya had taught you”.
Gudiya settled near window and hold piano in little hand. Rahul was almost reached to the main gate and heard the tune-well known tune played by Gudiya. His legs stopped, turn his face in the direction from where the sound was coming. He couldn’t believe what his eyes see- Oh my God! Same innocent smiling face, same tune. He was thinking as if Ramya was sitting in front of him. Gudiya was playing tune. As she saw a person coming towards her with very rare combination of smile and tears same time, ran away from window with fear.
Rahul couldn’t tolerant the cruel joke which destiny played again in his life. He felt of losing Ramya again. He ran away as a mad from the opposite direction of tune.......